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People regularly do stupid things that cause someone else an injury. Then the inevitable lawsuit gets filed, and then an insurance clam gets filed, too. But occasionally, the courts get it right in their decisions, and we get to make fun of the plaintiffs and defendants.

My friend Randy Maniloff is a genius attorney, a partner in the Business Insurance Practice Group at White & Williams in Philadelphia. He recently wrote an article that showcased these court decisions, and gave me permission to share them with you.

So, in order of dumbness (lowest to highest), here are the Top Ten Funniest Coverage Decisions of 2008:

10. A motivational speaker repeatedly urged a seminar participant to break a board with her bare hands. After she tried and was successful only in injuring her hand, she sued the speaker. In Reese v. Alea London Ltd., the Court decided that the speaker’s policy had a Professional Services exclusion that precluded coverage. I guess “mind over matter” doesn’t include lumber. I also guess you can be “board” to tears in this guy’s seminars.

9. The insured was playing around his backyard pool and tried to throw someone in the pool. However, he miscalculated the strength he’d need to complete the throw, and instead threw the victim onto the pool’s steps, seriously injuring the victim. State F*arm denied coverage. In State F*arm Fire & Casualty v. Superior Court, the Court decided that coverage was owed since the insured’s only intent was to get the victim wet. Note to the insured: next time you want to get a woman wet, take her out for dinner and dancing.

8. The insured got into a fight, and got his hand stuck in the glass of a sliding glass door. He shot the glass to free his hand and the bullet ricocheted into the chest of a woman inside the house. In Shelter Mutual Insurance v Wheat, the Court decided there was no coverage because the injury was not caused by an “accident.” In other news, Bob Vila will be hosting a memorial service for the door.

7. The insured business hired violent offenders to go door-to-door and sell magazines. Their aggressive sales tactics caused.injuries and at least one death. In Nautilus Insurance Company v. Reuter, the parties are waiting to see which way the Court interprets the policy term “occurrence” to figure out if there’s coverage. The Girl Scouts need to hire these guys for next year’s cookie drive.

6. A middle school student caused injuries to a teacher’s aide when, in the middle of a cafeteria food fight, he struck the aide with a garbage can. In Medrano v. State F*arm Insurance Company, the Court decided that the insurer had to provide defense under the Homeowners policy because the Complaint implied that the injuries were unintentional. In the student’s defense, he couldn’t tell the difference in the garbage or school cafeteria food.

5. A karaoke singer was waving around an ice cream scoop (her microphone?) when it flew out of her hand and hit someone, causing injuries. In Nationwide Mutual Fire Insurance v. Kim,the Court decided that the insurance company had to provide defense for the singer under her Homeowners liability coverage, since the Court didn’t buy the argument that the injuries weren’t because of negligence. I wonder if she was singing “Tutti Fruiti” at the time of the incident.

4. An insured restaurant had a gas grille at a tailgate party at a Jimmy Buffet concert. The gas grille wouldn’t light, so they poured gasoline on it, and the explosion caused injuries. InUnited States Liability Insurance Co. v. Harbor Club, the Court denied coverage to the restaurant because the incident was not on the insured’s premises. Yummy…toasted Parrotheads. I wonder if the smoke from this explosion could be distinguished from the marijuana cloud at the concert.

3. The insured caused injuries to an old friend by saying hello with his “signature greeting,” which was putting the old friend in a headlock and squeezing his head while asking him how he was doing. In Sanford v. Century Surety Co., the Court denied coverage because the injury was not caused by an accident and the “assault and battery” exclusion applied. Imagine how the insured must greet those who are not his friends.

2. The homeowner caused injuries and one death to party guests when the host used gunpowder as a propellant to shoot his potato gun. In Kiser v. Coffee, coverage was denied because injury was reasonably expected from this intentional act. The potato in question is now in a low earth orbit, visible in a clear night sky.

And the Number One Funniest Coverage Decision of 2008 is….

1. The insured’s minor son injured his friend by kicking him twice in the groin after learning that his friend’s sister did not like him. In American National Property & Casualty v. Hanna, coverage was denied because the injury was not caused by an accident. Love hurts…..

A big “thank you” to Deborah Richards, Geri Lumsden and Jarrett Smith for their smart-assed assistance with the one-liners in this article.

Stay tuned. I’m sure there will be plenty of court cases in 2009 for our next Top Ten List!

Now, I’d like to offer you two special reports at no cost. One is “5 Things To Do When Shopping For Car Insurance,” and the other is “5 Things To Avoid When Shopping For Car Insurance.” Each one is a $9.95 value, but free to you when you sign up for my newsletter at the website address below.

Marking 100 years, Boy Scouts reach out to more
CLAIRTON, Pa.—It was a scorching afternoon in Millvue Acres, a tidy public housing facility in Clairton. Outside, a few boys rode bicycles in the sun, two to a seat. Inside the Dorothy Davis Learning Center, children sat in the air conditioning and talked, too hot to play.

Read more on The York Dispatch

Cub Scout Day Camp fun
Noreen Hyslop photo Cub Scouts were busy from Wednesday through Friday at the annual Cub Scout Day Camp held each year at East City Park. Taking a moment to practice some building skills are Wyatt Chastain and Adam Mixon.

Read more on Dexter Daily Statesman

Cub Scout leader accused of child abuse
Walleshauser pleads not guilty as volunteer is fired from scouting.

Read more on Niagara Gazette

Copyright (c) 2010 Lucille Uttermohlen

How can you prove you are the better parent? This is a question attorneys hear a lot. There isn’t just one answer, and the advice you do get may not please you at all.

When people fight over custody of their children, courts are hesitant to take one party’s story as the whole truth. People perceive things differently when they are ending their lives together. The annoying habit you’ve tolerated for years suddenly becomes a good reason to ask for supervised visitation. The other parent’s strict parenting style is now described as abuse. In short, the perceptions of the parents towards each other change, and it becomes harder for the judge to believe either of them.

Often, judges appoint outsiders to evaluate the situation for them. The divorcing couple generally have to share the cost of these reports. The idea is that a disinterested third party can look at the whole situation and tell the court what is fact. The reporter should visit the couples’ homes, talk to the children’s teachers, baby-sitters and the parents’ friends After researching everything they can about the family, it is hoped that they can give the court an accurate picture as to the children’s best interests.

The best way to prepare yourself for a custody fight, and prove you’re a good parent is to be objective about the other parent. Make a list of his / her best qualities. If he was a good provider, write that down. If she was a good housekeeper, give her credit. If both of you worked to support the household, be honest about the real contribution the other parent made to the family.

What other contributions were made to the child’s well being by the other parent? Does he coach their sports activities? Does she lead the Cub Scout troop? Who makes the cookies that are passed out for birthdays at school? Who makes sure the kids have the right equipment for their activities? Who talks to teachers and goes to parent meetings?

What about when the kids are sick? Who misses work to get them to the doctor? Who makes sure they have the medicine they need? Who gets up with them in the middle of the night when they have bad dreams? Who do they run to when they skin their knees or get in a fight with other kids?

Children are happier when they are with the parent who makes them feel more secure. Hopefully, both parents contribute to that feeling. Dad may check the child’s bedroom for monsters at night, while Mom may put cold compresses on the child’s forehead when he is running a fever. Dad may go to school when the teachers need to talk about the window Junior broke, and Mom may bake cupcakes for the child’s Christmas party. In short, both parents usually contribute to the quality of the child’s life, and should give each other credit, even during a highly contested divorce.

Make plans for the other parent to have as much contact with the child as possible. Don’t just say, “he can have her any time he wants.” That is a promise that has been made and broken before. The judge has seen too many situations when “anytime she wants”, has turned into “anytime I say she can, which won’t be often.”

Make a list of the activities in which the non-custodian can participate. Get a schedule of school and sports events that the child generally attends. Offer the other parent the right of first refusal when you need child care, such as for a meeting or night out. Be generous about sharing holidays and other special occasions such as birthdays and vacations from school. Make sure you can assure the judge that you will encourage the children to have a positive attitude towards their other parent. If you paint him / her as the devil incarnate, you will appear to be a typical divorcee, and the judge will tend to believe that what you say is more self serving than informative.

The best way to approach the parent quality question is to remember that raising the child is a joint endeavor. Both of you wish you could be full time parents, but the end of your marriage makes that state impossible. Giving each other the benefit of the doubt, and encouraging each parent to stay active in the child’s care is the mark of a truly good parent. Trying to minimize the other parent’s part in the child’s life is usually not.Child Custody: How Can I Prove I’m Best

Children are often bullied and teased during their school years. For children with learning disabilities this teasing can be relentless and make them terrified to go to school each day. Being in special education classes carry with it a certain stigma, causing other students to ridicule and judge the students in these classes. Often times, safety can become an issue and students have to be sent to other schools. Many parents at this point choose to home school their child who has learning disabilities. By home schooling their child, they can insure these bullying will not occur during the school day.

Many parents may worry that their child will not get good social interaction when they are home schooled. This is not the case. Children with learning disabilities thrive in sports and other activities. Get your child involved in soccer or baseball, or find out from them what they enjoy. Some children need creative outlets such as acting or dancing; these are great ideas for getting the social interaction with their peers. You can also get them involved in activities such as 4H if they enjoy animals, or cub scouts for those that love the outdoors. There are so many options, do not feel as if your child will suffer from not having friends by being home schooled. It is a great idea for children with learning disabilities to interact with other children, so getting them involved will be extremely beneficial.

One of the greatest benefits to home schooling your child with learning disabilities is you will now be their primary teacher. You will not have to worry about them not getting enough attention in an overcrowded classroom. You will be able to give your child the one on one attention they deserve and need. You will notice immediately any learning difficulties your child is experiencing and not have to rely on the schools to do this for you.

While home schooling your child with learning disabilities is a wonderful option, you do have to make sure you are prepared and experienced to do the job. Some parents go into home schooling thinking it will be easy and not take up much time this is not true. home schooling takes planning and cares, you are now the teacher and responsible for the education of your child and making sure they are prepared for the future. Many parents find taking classes or seminars on home schooling very beneficial. It is also a good idea to join a support group, both for home schooling and for being a parent of a child with learning disabilities.

You will find counterparts in these groups who can assist and guide you when you need it most. You will also find there are many companies that specialize in home school curriculum designed for children with learning disabilities. You have the ability to purchase one package or pick and choose from the packages you like; this is a wonderful benefit of home schooling that is not offered in public schools. Because teaching is not “one size fits all”, you will find home schooling your child with learning disabilities to be wonderful for both you and them.

There are numerous benefits of home schooling a child with learning disabilities and even normal children. Benefits include choosing an appropriate and proper home school curriculum for your child. For more information about Home School and Curriculums, please do visit our site – http://www.homeschoolcurriculum.org/